Saturday, 6 February 2016

Five Thoughts on Turning 30


Can you guess how old I am...?

Last month I turned 30. Where does the time fly?! The closer I got to my birth date, the more I started thinking about what I had learned and achieved during my (almost) 30 years on earth. Am I happy? Am I older and wiser? Had I followed through on all aspirations and dreams I had set myself? 

Google “turning 30” and there are countless articles about what this should mean and some resonated with me. Yes, university was a fantastic learning experience (in more ways than one) yes, I’m glad I made the time to go travelling and see some amazing countries (and will continue to do so), yes I'm living a more grown up life (happily married, being further along in my career), and as you grow older you realise just how important family is, more than ever. 

All of these points are true and I find I identify with many but I can't help but think these articles based on the idea of “30 things to do before turning 30” if you can't tick off at least half of these amazing "things" makes you feel like a total failure and you're doomed to a life of a loser.

Personally I don’t think you can put a timeline on these things and certain decisions or outcomes in your life are out of your hands. You can do everything you can to make this “thing” happen, set yourself goals (I’m a fan of this!), but sometimes despite all the trying (and non-trying)  in the world, life just doesn’t work out that way.

So instead, I decided to do a blog post on my five thoughts on turning 30 that have resonated with me and wanted to share with my readers. So here are mine:

Relationships are everything – The people you love are the most important things in your life, whether that is family or friendships, these relationships you have with others can help you get through anything. Yes work is important but relationships with family or friends are equally as important too. When things get hectic or times get tough it can be easy to isolate yourself from your loved ones but human beings need each other. That is a fact of life, so why fight it? Reciprocation is key in all relationships, so I aim to make the time and effort to keep up my relationships with family and friends. Try to remember to remind those people close to you that you appreciate them. They may not be around forever…

Be kind – always. Even when you don’t want to, even to those who are not kind to you. Being kind is not only a good act, but showing an act of kindness makes you feel better too. Mother Theresa once said: “If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives; Be kind anyway.”  Being kind is more important than being right, or having the last word. Sometimes there is no point in proving to someone that you know the answers when it’s going to cause a riff. Ever heard the saying "silence is golden"? Well use that the next time you want the last word, just be kind and humble instead!

Don't be too hard on yourself - The most important relationship you have is the one with yourself, so why give yourself such a hard time? We put so much pressure on ourselves from everything to our careers, relationships, friendships, even appearances, to achieve an ideal or standard of living. Sometimes it's ok if things don't go according to plan or don't work out. If you ever feel like the pressure is too much, taking time out to focus on yourself and reevaluating your decisions can put things into better perspective. Having a good relationship with yourself gives you important insights into your life. That means the ability to value yourself as a person, and embrace your strengths and weaknesses.  But it also means not to be so hard on yourself too! Everyone makes mistakes, so take the lessons you learned from it and move forward.

Balance your budget – Champagne taste on a beer budget?
Still struggling to manage your money? Then now is the time to start organising this area of your life. It's never too late to get your finances in check and there is lots you can do to get started: start budgeting your monthly spending, open a savings account, build up your credit, check your bank balance regularly are just a few. To get some more ideas, check out useful websites that give practical advice on saving money like Money Saving Expert tips here: http://www.moneysavingexpert.com/shopping/chat-tips-gold

Give Back - There is nothing more rewarding than lending a helping hand. Being of service to someone in need is probably the most important thing that all of us can do. And selfishly, it makes you feel good.
Plus you never know when you’re going to be that person in need. If you’re looking for ways to give back, check out https://do-it.org/ and https://www.ncvo.org.uk/ncvo-volunteering/i-want-to-volunteer for tips and guidance on where to start.


I hope you find my thoughts on turning 30 useful! These are just a few of the things I've learned along the way, I would love to hear yours! Message below or contact me doyounoah@ymail.com 

2 comments:

Nikki-ann said...

A belated happy 30th birthday!

VioletDaffodils said...

I was really moved by this post, basically everything you have spoken about really spoke to me (cheesey I know! but its true) Especially about how important relationships are and making time for family, this is something I feel strongly about and yet I know I need to work on it even more, but its true they are so important.
And about being kind as well, you have raised points that really sit with me there's moments lately where I've had to bite my tongue which I'm not used to because I used to do so when I was younger and was quite a pushover so nowadays I stick up for myself loads more than I used to but there's been some challenging days lately where I've had to try not to retaliate which is difficult for a stubborn person like myself haha but it's true that sometimes there is no point in having to prove something to someone. So I will definitely practice this more :)

Thank you for inspiring me with this awesome post! :D

VioletDaffodils
xx

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